我拿起那条链子。她用双手接过它，向前探了探身，在我的脖子后把简易的项链钩系好。然后她向后退了几步，好像在看看是否合适。我低下头看着闪闪发亮的玻璃珠和已失去光泽的金色链子，然后抬起头望着她。我很认真地轻声说道：“哦，玛丽亚，这链子真漂亮。你妈妈一定会喜欢的。"我们已无法抑制住泪水。她踉踉跄跄地扑进我的怀里，我们都哭了。在那短暂的一刻我成了她的妈妈，而她送给了我一份最珍贵的礼物：她的信任和爱。
it was christmas 1961. i was teaching in a small town in ohio where my twenty-seven third graders eagerly anticipated the great day of gifts giving.
a tree covered with tinsel and 1 paper chains graced one corner. in another rested a manger scene produced from cardboard and poster paints by 2, and sometimes grubby, hands. someone had brought a doll and placed it on the straw in the cardboard box that served as the manger. it didn't matter that you could pull a string and hear the blue-eyed, golden-haired dolly say, "my name is susie." "but jesus was a boy baby!" one of the boys proclaimed. nonetheless, susie stayed.
each day the children produced some new wonder -- 3 of 4, hand-made trinkets, and german bells made from wallpaper samples, which we hung from the ceiling. through it all she remained 5, watching from afar, seemingly miles away. i wondered what would happen to this quiet child, once so happy, now so suddenly 6. i hoped the festivities would appeal to her. but nothing did. we made cards and gifts for mothers and dads, for sisters and brothers, for grandparents, and for each other. at home the students made the popular fried marbles and vied with one another to bring in the prettiest ones. " you put them in a hot frying pan, teacher. and you let them get real hot, and then you watch what happens inside. but you don't fry them too long or they break." so, as my gift to them, i made each of my students a little 7 for carrying their fried marbles. and i knew they had each made something for me: bookmarks carefully cut, colored, and sometimes pasted together; cards and special drawings; liquid 8 doilies, hand-fringed, of course.
the day of gift-giving finally came. we oohed and aahed over our handiwork as the presents were exchanged. through it all, she sat quietly watching. i had made a special pouch for her, red and green with white lace. i wanted very much to see her smile. she opened the package so slowly and carefully. i waited but she turned away. i had not 9 the wall of 10 she had built around herself.
after school the children left in little groups, 11 about the great day yet to come when long-hoped-for two-wheelers and bright sleds would appear beside their trees at home. she lingered, watching them bundle up and go out the door. i sat down in a child-sized chair to catch my breath, hardly aware of what was happening, when she came to me with outstretched hands, bearing a small white box, unwrapped and slightly soiled, as though it had been held many times by unwashed, childish hands. she said nothing. "for me?" i asked with a weak smile. she said not a word, but nodded her head. i took the box and gingerly opened it. there inside, 12 green, a fried marble hung from a golden chain. then i looked into that elderly eight-year-old face and saw the question in her dark brown eyes. in a flash i knew -- she had made it for her mother, a mother she would never see again, a mother who would never hold her or brush her hair or share a funny story, a mother who would never again hear her childish joys or sorrows. a mother who had taken her own life just three weeks before.
i held out the chain. she took it in both her hands, reached forward, and secured the simple clasp at the back of my neck. she stepped back then as if to see that all was well. i looked down at the shiny piece of glass and the 13 golden chain, then back at the giver. i meant it when i whispered," oh, maria, it is so beautiful. she would have loved it." neither of us could stop the tears. she stumbled into my arms and we wept together. and for that brief moment i became her mother, for she had given me the greatest gift of all: herself.
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