日期:2022-03-09 this girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks, whats a phallic symbol? the doctor says, youre kidding. the girl says no! i dont know! whats a phallic symbol? the doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says, you see? this is afailic symb... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-04-20 a horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, so, why the long face? a penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender, has my father been in here? the bartender says, i dont know. what does he look like? a kangaroo walks into a bar and orders a bee... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-04-20 a couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. he doesnt seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head. the other hunter whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. he gasps to the operator... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-04-13 a family of three tomatoes a family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. the big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says, ket... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-25 seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. he went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. the elderly gentleman went back in a m... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-25 a couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. on the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if hes getting sentimental because theyre celebrating 50 wonderful years together. he replies, no, i was thinking about t... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-18 as a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. answering, he heard his wifes voice urgently warning him, herman, i just heard on the news that theres a car going the wrong way on 280. please be careful! hell, said herman, its... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-18 the doctor tells his patient: well i have good news and bad news... the patient says, lay it on me doc. whats the bad news? you have alzheimers disease. good heavens! whats the good news? you can go home and forget about it!... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-17 坐在车里的女士发现她们连闯了几个红灯,问开车的女司机,结果女司机却说:哦,我在开车吗? after a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. this time the woman in the passenger seat... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-17 my name is alice smith and i was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. i noticed his diploma, which had his full name. suddenly, i remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-12 an old grandma brings a bus driver a bag of peanuts every day. first the bus driver enjoyed the peanuts but after a week of eating them he asked: please granny, dont bring me peanuts anymore. have them yourself.. the granny answers: you know, i dont... 阅读全文>> 日期:2020-03-12 a cannibal is invited to a teambuilding week in the mountains. the instructions say he can also bring one friend. but when he arrives, he brings ten people. the organizer is shocked: come on alan, what the heck, the invitation said you can only brin... 日期:2020-03-12 peter comes very drunk home late at night. he wakes his sleeping wife: emily wake up! you know what just happened!? - no, she replies sleepily. - i went to the toilet and the light switched on all by itself. and when i went out of there, the light s... 日期:2020-03-12 the police stop an old guy in questionable condition at 1 am. what are you doing out so late, sir? asks the police officer. im going to a seminar on the harmful effects of alcohol, replies the man. are you pulling my leg or something?! says the poli... 日期:2020-03-12 two men walk in the jungle. one has a gun on his back and the other one a big rock. the one with the rock asks the other man, why do you have a gun on your back? the guy replies, when a wild animal comes, i can defend myself. and what about you, why... 日期:2020-03-12 一位男子走到警察局宣称,我妻子失踪了。 a man walks into a police station and announces, my wifes gone missing. the police officer says, ok sir, well help you. since when has your wife been missing? the man replies, since about a month ago. the polic... 日期:2017-05-17 brian and his two friends are hanging out at a bar. theyre talking about life, sports and other guy things when the conversation finally gets around to to their marriages. his first friend says: i think my wife is having an affair with the electrici... 日期:2017-04-12 down south, bubba called his attorney and asked, is it true theys suin them cigarette companies fer causin people to git cancer ? yes, bubba, sure is true, responded the lawyer. and now someone is suin them fast food restaurants fer makin them fat a... 日期:2017-04-12 when bob found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. so one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. her natural beauty t... 日期:2017-04-12 woman goes into a hardware store and asks the clerk for two aa batteries. the clerk gestures with his fingers and says, come this way, and heads towards the back of the store. if i could come that way, she tells the retreating clerk, i wouldnt need... |
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